Skip to content

Mutant Palm

  • About
  • Historical Chinese Image Collections
  • SchizOlympics: Words Fail Us Bibliography

LOL Fu Manchu: An Upcoming Three Part Series

Posted on September 7, 2007 by davesgonechina

I’m back, and so is he!

Chapter 1: Heinous Hackers
Chapter 1.5: Hackers and Spies

Chapter 2: Poison Pajamas!


Updated to add appropriate inappropriate font from 1001FreeFonts, appropriately titled inappropriately as “Chinese Takeaway”.

To those of you who don’t remember Fu Manchu, he was the creation of Sax Rohmer, British pulp novelist. You can read the very first Fu Manchu book, The Insidious Dr. Fu Manchu for free here. Fu is first described thusly:

“There is little to fear until we arrive home,” he said calmly. “Afterwards there is much. To continue: This man, whether a fanatic or a duly appointed agent, is, unquestionably, the most malign and formidable personality existing in the known world today. He is a linguist who speaks with almost equal facility in any of the civilized languages, and in most of the barbaric. He is an adept in all the arts and sciences which a great university could teach him. He also is an adept in certain obscure arts and sciences which no university of to-day can teach. He has the brains of any three men of genius. Petrie, he is a mental giant.”

“You amaze me!” I said.

“As to his mission among men. Why did M. Jules Furneaux fall dead in a Paris opera house? Because of heart failure? No! Because his last speech had shown that he held the key to the secret of Tongking. What became of the Grand Duke Stanislaus? Elopement? Suicide? Nothing of the kind. He alone was fully alive to Russia’s growing peril. He alone knew the truth about Mongolia. Why was Sir Crichton Davey murdered? Because, had the work he was engaged upon ever seen the light it would have shown him to be the only living Englishman who understood the importance of the Tibetan frontiers. I say to you solemnly, Petrie, that these are but a few. Is there a man who would arouse the West to a sense of the awakening of the East, who would teach the deaf to hear, the blind to see, that the millions only await their leader? He will die. And this is only one phase of the devilish campaign. The others I can merely surmise.”

“But, Smith, this is almost incredible! What perverted genius controls this awful secret movement?”

“Imagine a person, tall, lean and feline, high-shouldered, with a brow like Shakespeare and a face like Satan, a close-shaven skull, and long, magnetic eyes of the true cat-green. Invest him with all the cruel cunning of an entire Eastern race, accumulated in one giant intellect, with all the resources of science past and present, with all the resources, if you will, of a wealthy government– which, however, already has denied all knowledge of his existence. Imagine that awful being, and you have a mental picture of Dr. Fu-Manchu, the yellow peril incarnate in one man.”

Posted in China

Post navigation

Tap Water Vs. The Beverly Hillbillies
LOL Fu Manchu: An Upcoming Three Part Series

One thought on “LOL Fu Manchu: An Upcoming Three Part Series”

  1. augustine says:
    May 24, 2020 at 6:23 pm

    LOLZ.

    Alright, welcome back!

    -from a reader

Comments are closed.

Recent Posts

  • Survey Says… “Oops”
  • Happy China Internet Maintenance Day!
  • CIRC 2009
  • Chinese Al Jazeera? No Chance.
  • Teacup Feet

Recent Comments

  • kamagra 50mg on SchizOlympics: Words Fail Us Bibliography
  • kamagra oral jelly on About
  • wbflw on About
  • siteme on About
  • cheap viagra on Historical Chinese Image Collections

Archives

  • May 2013
  • June 2009
  • May 2009
  • March 2009
  • February 2009
  • January 2009
  • December 2008
  • November 2008
  • October 2008
  • July 2008
  • June 2008
  • May 2008
  • April 2008
  • March 2008
  • February 2008
  • January 2008
  • December 2007
  • November 2007
  • October 2007
  • September 2007
  • July 2007
  • June 2007
  • May 2007
  • April 2007
  • March 2007
  • February 2007

Categories

  • China
  • Uncategorized

Meta

  • Log in
  • Entries feed
  • Comments feed
  • WordPress.org
Proudly powered by WordPress | Theme: MiniZen by Martin Stehle.